Rhythm and Blues (U.K. 2000)

The Gist:

In London, an attractive man named John befriends a skinhead, Byron, and though Byron in extremely swift order: is convinced he should be become a hustler; joins a gay male escort service; and is chosen for hire by an older, eccentric, rich American called Bad Daddy for a night of debauchery. As all this is going on a mysterious serial killer hustler, "The Rent Boy Ripper," is murdering his clients.

Comments:

First off, the movie is largely bad. It's a gay, hustler, murder thriller, comedy; and it doesn't particularly "do" any of those adjectives very well. 

There are occasional humorous moments, but overall the movie is not that funny. The thriller / mystery part of the story alternates between being mildly interesting and boring. The acting ranges from bad to adequate, which is not helped by occasionally confusing dialogue. That last bit is in reference to dialogue / editing, as the movie has people occasionally referencing conservations that only take place in deleted scenes. 

Negatives aside, the movie has an odd charm to it, a sort of low budget, sad, Britishness to it that made me not mind how bad it was. Then again maybe I didn't mind that the movie sucked because I think Paul Blackthorne (John) is hot. 

Regardless of how prurient thoughts affected my judgement, the movie is not worth watching. Unless you're into comedic hustler thrillers that aren't particularly humorous, thrilling, or good that is. 

Women:

Yes

People of color:

No

Gratuitous nudity:

Women, yes. 
Men, teasingly nearly, but no actual nudity 

• Director: Stephen Lenhoff
• Writer: Michael Jones
• Actors: Angus MacInnes, Ian Henderson, Paul Blackthorne
• 98 min
• IMDB

Hold Your Peace (U.S. 2011)

The Gist:

Grouchy guy Aiden is asked by his grumpy ex-boyfriend Max to be his best man at his upcoming commitment ceremony / wedding to Forrest. Thing is Aiden is single, and worse still in love with Max. In order to not appear totally lame Aiden, asks his best friend's other gay friend Lance to go with him to the commitment ceremony / wedding and pretend to be his new boyfriend Brick. There Lance/Brick immediately falls for Max's fiancé Forrest, and pretty much what you expect to happen happens.

Comments (with a major spoiler that in reality is not):

The problem with "pretty much what you expect to happen happens" is not that the story is predictable, but that that it was told badly. The production is uneven, the acting is all over the place from bad to adequate, and the characters are boring. Well, at least the leads are. 

Part of this is that both protagonist Aiden and his ex-boyfriend Max are rude jerks. You can see when the story switches gears and goes to "Aiden's learned his lesson so feel sorry for him now," but you never move away from thinking he's annoying (or at least I never did).

Aside from two bothersome guys, there's fiancé Forest, who is played as perfect, and effeminate twink Lance/Brick who might have been interesting if the script hadn't called for him to spend most of his onscreen time weeping. The advice giving female best friend ends up being the least annoying of the characters, but that's not saying much. 

The major spoiler is this, not that the couples you know will end up together end up together, but that it happens suddenly right at the end of the story. With a snap of the fingers, poof everyone is running off with who they should be with no attempt at dialogue or explanation. Not even the expected "Hey I know we were supposed to get married but i've fallen in love with someone else, sorry 'bout that." While going off in an unexpected direction can be good, in the case it feels more like lazy writing. 

So uninteresting characters in an obvious story that is told poorly. Not surprisingly I wouldn't recommend watching it. 

Women:

Several, though primarily in one scene only. 

People of color:

Yes

Gratuitous nudity:

No

• Director: Wade McDonald 
• Writer: Wade McDonald 
• Actors: Chad Ford, Scott Higgens, Aleisha Force
• 96 min
• Note: I have not dealt with the Bechdel test in these write ups. Simplified, the test asks if a work includes at least two women who talk to each other about something other than a man. Frankly most of the movies I talk about here would fail to pass due to lack of female roles. This movie passes because during a bachelor party scene the guests, mainly women, are ALL far more interested in getting drunk than in congratulating the "happy couple." The fact that the minor characters don't even care about the lead roles amuses me more than it should. 
• IMDB

Love's Coming (ใช่รักหรือเปล่า)(Thailand 2014)

The Gist:

Four teenage boys, Zee, Arm, Pid, and Gump are best friends, and things are great, except that Gump hasn't been around lately because he is always too busy tutoring his neighbor Nai. Because of this sudden prioritizing of his hot male neighbor over his friends, Zee begins to wonder if Gump is gay, so he gets the group, and a gay 'uncle' (who prefers to be called Aunt Alexandra), to come up with a series of overly complicated plans to find out the truth about Gump and Nai.

Comments:

It's a largely cute movie with a plot that doesn't make too much sense because instead of a series of ever more elaborate traps and goofy shenanigans to get Gump to come out of the closet, they could have simply just asked him at the beginning of the story if he was in love with Nai or not. Then again that would have made for a very short movie. As is, this is wacky teen comedy so some silliness is to be expected. Also, these are teenage boys, more so straight teenage boys, and teenage boys are known for doing stupid things, so this is less of an issue here as compared to other movies where everything could have been resolved in ten minutes had people just actually talked to each other like real adults instead of movie adults. 

Which leads us to 'Aunt Alexandra.' He's very much a movie version a person, more so a movie version of a camp gay man. Luckily he's written just slightly deep enough to be more than just someone to be laughed at. You get to sympathize with him as well. 

While he isn't really an issue for me, there are some problematic "comedic" scenes. The most glaring being when, as part of the "is he or isn't he" hijinks, the straight teen boys find themselves at a pool with some speedo wearing gay guys showing off their bodies. The boys reaction to the sight of non-hetero men wanting to be objectified is to freak out and get physically ill. Gay panic is funny you all. Yes. Sarcasm. 

Despite this and some other clunker scenes, for the most part the movie is harmless fluff, and mostly positive as it becomes clear that the boys care about their friend Gump and will support him whatever the truth turns out to be. 

Women: 

Mothers, and a girlfriend, so yes

People of Color:

Yes

Gratuitous nudity:

No. Though there are lots of shots of shirtless and swimsuited Thai guys if you're into that. 

• Director: Naphat Chaithiangthum
• Writer: Naphat Chaithiangthum
• Actors: Korn Khunaitpapisiri, Suraphat Kirivichien, Norrapat Sakulsong, Chanon Santinatornkul, Suttinut Uengtrakul
• 108 min
• Thai
• IMDB 

The Foxy Merkins (U.S. 2013)

The Gist:

A young naive gay kid, new to hustling, is shown the ropes by a more experienced hustler and they make a connection, becoming friends and more, despite the more experienced hustler being, or at claiming to be, straight, as they do what they can to survive the tough life on the streets. 

Now take the cliche filled hustler movie you've pictured in your head and turn into a comedy with adult women in place of skinny gay twinks. 

Comments:

The movie was made by the same people who did Codependent Lesbian Space Alien Seeks Same. This time instead of low budget, extremely quirky and decidedly odd comedy riffing on bad 50's sci-fi movies, we have  a low budget, extremely quirky and decidedly odd comedy riffing on hustler movies. 

The two leads have great chemistry together, and overall it's a funny movie, though given the subject matter it helps if you're familiar with the genre, specifically Midnight Cowboy and My Own Private Idaho. Many of the jokes and situations only really make sense if you are familiar with the source material, otherwise the requisite "search to find my lost mother" or the required "men are incapable of loving another man" speech are not so much funny as just confusing. Although in case with the reversed genders it's now "women can't love other women," which comes off as very strange and nonsensical, and presumably is part of the intent and source of much of the humor. Other jokes, such as having the clothing store Talberts be THE place for lesbian prostitutes to hang out at are a bit more straightforward.

While I enjoyed it, it's not exactly a great movie. It does have a lot of issues. Not all the jokes are funny, some, such as the harassing cops sequence go on for too long; and there is no real plot, just our leads drifting in a vaguely Private Idaho direction with occasional Midnight Cowboy imagery. The basic idea of the movie is a problem as well, as unlike the Science Fiction of Codependent Lesbian Space Alien, not everyone has seen hustler movies which limits its audience to a large extent. 

So while I liked it, I'm not sure I'd recommend it. At least not without a lot of caveats. That you be a fan of quirky low budget movies. That you can easily ignore the lack of plot. That you know your hustler movies. But mainly that you have a very odd-ball sense of humor, because this is no where near 'normal' comedy territory.

Women:

Yes

People of color:

Yes 

Gratuitous nudity:

Yes

• Director: Madeleine Olnek
• Writers: Lisa Haas, Jackie Monahan, Madeline Olnek
• Actors: Lisa Haas, Jackie Monahan
• 81 min
• IMDB