eCupid (U.S. 2011)

The Gist:

In a fairy tale for a social media age, we have Marshall, a man about to turn 30 who is unfulfilled by his job, and uncertain about his seven year relationship that has settled into being comfortable. Bored one night, he downloads an app, "eCupid," which promises to find him true love. The apparently omnipotent app proceeds to give Marshall exactly what he desired, life as a single man, with a string of hot men vying for his attention. Given everything he wants, why can he only think of his now ex-boyfriend Gabe?

Comments (with unimportant spoilers):

The answer to why he can only think of his boyfriend Gabe is obvious of course. It's because this is a moral lesson teaching romantic comedy with fairy tale overtones and a mobile phone app in place of an ornery genie granting your every wish to disaster. 

It is a perfectly adequate, perfunctory, "gay flick," that does exactly what it promises to do, be cute. No more, no less.

Which oddly is the worst problem with it. This feels like it was aimed squarely for average and having achieved that, "they" have ended up up with a fast food meal of a movie. Neither good nor bad, not surprising, and oddly lacking. 

General comments aside and focusing on the story, It's a bit strange that when the boyfriend Gabe receives a text saying Marshall was bored with the relationship, instead of getting mad, or having a fight, or just talking about it, Gabe immediately breaks up with him ending their seven year relationship over momentary boredom. 

Issues of 'adequacy' aside, the movie is what is. A gay flick that is cute if you watch it, but is not a loss if you don't.

Women:

One. Morgan Fairchild as, well, a mysterious and possibly powerful someone who knows a thing or two about love. Actually, considering the movie's name is eCUPID, it may have made more sense if her role was cast with a man instead. Likely the first and last time I ever argue that a gay flick would had been better with fewer women, which in this case would mean no women. 

People of color:

None

Gratuitous nudity:

None

• Director: J.C. Calciano
• Writer: J.C. Calciano
• Houston Rhines, Noah Schuffman
• 95 min
• IMDB

Why not me? (Pourquoi pas moi?)(France 1999)

The Gist:

A group of 20-something, lesbian and gay, French expat friends living in Barcelona decide to finally stop lying and come out to their parents. Further, they figure the best way to do this is at all at once at a party for mutual support, both for themselves, and their parents as well. Little do they realize that the drama they were expecting, of potential parental disapproval, would be the least of what happens that night. 

Comments:

It's a cute fun movie with a large cast. Hmm, considering we are talking about a lothario lesbian in danger of running out of available women in Barcelona, a football (soccer) playing gay man 'crushing' on a team member, a Star Wars obsessed woman, her educated-to-the-point-of-unemployable girlfriend, a "straight but not narrow" secretary, all their parents (who are another long list of attributes and quirks), and all their potential love interests, make that a very large cast. 

There's a "Almodóvar-lite" feel to the movie, with the brightness of it, strong female roles, wild coincidences, and high drama, though admittedly, not with the same quality or skill. It also plays with elements of fantastic realism, but in the end the main qualities that struck me were again, that it was cute and fun. 

It's worth a watch.

Women:

Many. 

People of color:

A couple.

Gratuitous nudity:

Extremely minor.

• Director: Stéphane Giusti
• Writer: Stéphane Giusti
• Actors: Amira Casar, Julie Gayet, Bruno Putzulu, Alexandra London
• 96 min
• French, Spanish
• IMDB

Fruit fly (U.S. 2009)

The Gist:

Bethesda, a performance artist, moves to San Francisco for a six month stay to work on her next piece, a variant of the work she habitually returns to, her desire to find her biological mother. While in the city she makes a new family of friends, and in getting a new gay best friend, gains the label "fag hag" much to her initial annoyance. Also, being a musical, people sing and perform as the city is filled with the lights and tinny sounds of 6 bit games. 

Comments:

From an interview I read, the story goes that while promoting an earlier film they'd worked on, whenever H.P. Mendoza (Writer/Director) and L.A. Renigen (Bethesda)  'hit' a LGBT festival, men would automatically assume that she was a fag hag. This oddity prompted an idea that turned into Fruit Fly. 

It's not your standard musical. Many scenes were filmed in gorilla style, that is, on public streets and locations on the sly without permits. People sing about public transportation, teenage angst, hooking up, and 'workshop-ing' their lives to tunes intentionally reminiscent of old video games. Instead of grandiose story of large massive events with a definitive dramatic conclusion, this is more of a character piece where life happens.

From what I remember, (professional) reviews tended to be mixed, but personally I really like it. The movie is fun and filled with energy and light, and features people who (in gender, race, age, and sexuality) would normally be ignored in most movies. 

Regardless of my opinion, if the inherent goofiness of people breaking out into song is off putting to you, or alternatively, if you are a strong musical fan who can't stand when actors don't have strong voices, then it wouldn't be worth watching. 

On the other hand, if quirky oddball movies with a strong sense of style and place are your kind of thing, then it's worth a watch. 

Women:

Many 

People of color:

Many 

Gratuitous nudity:

Nope

• Director: H.P. Mendoza
• Writer: H.P. Mendoza
• Actors: L.A. Renigen, Mike Curtis, Theresa Navarro, E.S. Park, H.P. Mendoza
• 94 min
• Musical
• IMDB

Just A Question Of Love (Juste Une Question D'Amour) (France 2000)

The Gist:

Laurent works very hard to convince his family that he is straight, even pretending his best friend is a serious girlfriend. His school work on the other hand, does not receive quite as much effort on his part, to the point that he is danger of flunking out of agricultural college. As a last chance he is given an internship working under a researcher, Cédric, sparking events that will bring family, truth, friendship, and love to a dramatic conclusion.

Comments (with an unsurprising spoiler):

The spoiler is this, the protagonist spends the majority of the movie repeatedly saying it will not go well when his parents and family finds out he is gay. His parents and family are repeatedly shown verifying that yes, they will react badly when they find out he is gay.

Given this, it's a bit much that characters (the same ones who'd been promoting his coming out) are surprised that Laurent's parents and family react badly when he finally comes out to them. 

That aside, it's well done. Not earth shattering good, but good enough. Although given that it is not merely a romance drama, but rather a coming out romance drama, a lot of time is spent with Laurent's parents dealing with his news which can get a bit tiresome, but overall still worth a watch. 

Women:

Mothers, aunts, family, friends, so in a word, yes.

People of color:

Nope

Gratuitous nudity:

Minor

• Director: Christian Faure
• Writer: Christian Faure, Annick Laboulette, Pierre Pauquet
• Actors: Cyrille Thouvenin, Stéphan Guérin-Tillié
• 88 min
• TV Movie
• French
• IMDB

The Gay Deceivers (U.S. 1969)

The Gist:

In the late 1960's Danny and Elliot avoid the draft and the Vietnam war by claiming they are homosexuals. When it appears that the army is checking to see if they were lying, they move into a "gay" apartment complex, setting up a situation where they attempt to juggle girlfriends and normal life on the one hand, and acting like effeminate queens on the other. 

Comments with spoilers (then again the movie is over 40 years old):

I had first heard about the movie when I read Vito Russo's The Celluloid Closet where three things are noted about it:

1. It's homophobic. (And it is, misogynistic as well)
2. The actor playing the manager of the "gay" apartment complex tried to downplay the worst aspects of the homophobic humor. (It's debatable just how much of a positive effect he had, though in his favor, he is one of the better things about the movie and is almost more than just a walking stereotype)
3. There's a final joke about why the army was keeping tabs on them. (The army is full of homosexuals you see, and doesn't want straight men like Danny and Elliot in it)

These three notes aside, what I found most interesting about the movie is that it's a cautionary tale.

The boys start off the movie with straight white male privilege up the wazoo. Danny has a golden future laid out for him, a fixed path from law school to marriage to a corner office in a big law firm, while Elliot is a laid back oversexed gigolo where everything he wants is handed to him on a silver platter by rich women. 

However, the rules of male heterosexuality are inflexible, with no allowances for deviation. As soon as the stink of homosexuality touches them, their lives are wrecked. Over the course of the movie they loose their girlfriends, family, and employment. Even their sex lives dry up due to their charade. 

As far as family and friends are concerned all the boys did was move into a ridiculously decorated one bedroom apartment with "outrageous" neighbors, yet this is evidence enough to condemn them as deviants. Even when they come clean and admit it was all an act, they aren't belived, because again, the straight and narrow path is very narrow. 

When Elliot loses his job as a lifeguard (because homosexuals cannot be trusted around children) this is shown as wrong, not because discrimination against gay people is wrong, but rather because he is actually straight. Then again, this just reinforces the attitude that they were asking for trouble when they started their ruse. 

Despite all of that, it is arguable that the movie isn't that bad for it's portrayal of homosexuality. At least not too bad in context for the time period it was made. All the gay characters are silly queens yes, but no one is a psychopathic murderer or ends up dead, which was progress. 

Even if my reactions and thoughts about the homophobia displayed are all an oversensitive overreaction and the movie is just a "playing gay" comedy, I don't know that I'd recommend watching it. For a comedy, it's not that funny. At least not by modern standards since the majority of jokes fall along the lines of "Isn't it Hilarious that Homosexuals Want to be Women?"  

On the other hand, if you're good at watching things in context of the time they were made, or want to see it as an example of historical representations of homosexuality in movies, it would be an interesting watch. 

Women: 

Mothers, girlfriends, lovers, but only in the "real" world. The homosexual world is female free. 

People of color:

None

Gratuitous nudity:

There are a couple of sort of risqué shots. Actually, it may be interesting that the more "handsome" of the two leads is treated as a sex object. Did playing gay turn him into a woman as far as the 'camera' was concerned, or was his inability to remain fully clothed a "bone" of sorts for women (or gay men?) in the audience?

• Director: Bruce Kessler
• Writers: Abe Polsky, Gil Lasky, Jerome Wish
• Actors: Kenvin Coughlin, Larry Casey 
• 97 min
• IMDB

SoulMaid (U.S. 2007)

The Gist:

Moses has epilepsy which give him visions; that lead him first to true love in the form of Steve, the (formerly straight) literal man of his dreams; then later to Glintentica, who may be a figment of his imagination, or who may an evil spirit who wants to take over his body in an effort to wipe out the local gay population by turning them all from prissy effeminate queens to boring straight men. 

When it turns out to be the later, the (formerly straight) boyfriend and an annoying female roommate hope to rid Moses of Glintentica by performing the most bizarre exorcism ever, despite Glintentica's threats to turn Steve (the formerly straight boyfriend) straight again if they succeed. 

Will true love prevail? Does anyone care? 

Comments:

The people involved in this were apparently trying to make a wacky romantic comedy with commentary about ex-gay therapy. It's possible that the idea could have worked,  but unfortunately, they didn't go far enough, which considering the plot description may seem an odd critique. 

The problem is that while they ended up with a crazy movie, it's not crazy enough to to overcome a huge number of issues such as poor script, wonky characterization and bad acting. In the end, the final product trips over itself, and falls somewhere between boring and just plain bad. 

The best thing about it is that the lead isn't too bad an actor. There is also the fact that even if it failed, the people involved at least tried to be interesting, if weird. Still, all in all, not worth watching. 

Women: 

One and a half. The most annoying female roommate ever, and the "evil goddess" Glintentica, who despite being played by a woman, is (if I'm reading the credits correctly) voiced by a man.

People of color:

No

Gratuitous nudity:

No, though the character of Moses who between his job as a sort of, but not really nude-maid and being written as being clothes phobic, spends a lot of screen time in his undies doing yoga poses. 

• Directors: Jeffrey Maccubbin, Jeffrey Thomas McHale, Dan Mohr, Josef Steiff
• Writer: Josef Steiff
• Actors: Tom Bailey, Becca Connolly, Joe Schenck
• 95 min
• IMDB

You Should Meet My Son (U.S. 2010)

The Gist: 

After years of trying to set up her son with eligible women over Sunday dinners, a mother learns that her son is gay. Determined that he not live his life alone, she and her sister set out to find him a husband. 

Comments:

It's a cute movie that does a good job of being amusing and is, well, for lack of a better word, cute. 

There are a few issues, some jokes fall flat, acting levels vary a bit, and the "gay bar as menagerie of wildly varying stereotypes" is so cliche that it needs to be retired, but for the most part the movie works as a light entertainment comedy with a "serious" message of acceptance and unconditional love.

Worth a watch if you're in the mood for a silly, big-hearted indie movie that doesn't require any thought on your part and that is again, amusing and cute. 

Women:

Several

People of color:

Several

Gratuitous nudity:

Nope

• Director: Keith Hartman
• Writer: Keith Hartman 
• Actors: Joanne McGee, Carol Goans, Stewart Carrico
• 85 min
• IMDB

Longhorns (U.S. 2011)

The Gist:

Kevin is a Texan "good ol' boy" college student who is going through a phase. A phase that exists in certain gay porn scenarios where 'straight' college guys masterbate together,  "lending a helping hand," or more, all the while pretending that there is nothing gay about it at all. A phase that is forced to be questioned when Kevin befriends an openly gay college student named Caesar. 

Comments:

The movie quickly starts to feel like a rather timid soft porn flick, with scene after scene after scene of male characters in bed together 'banging the bishop,' 'charming the snake,' 'shaking hands the devil,' 'manhandling the ham candle,' well you get the idea. Unfortunately you can only watch so many repeats of bare chested actors lying in bed, hands under covers, pretending to jerk off before it starts to get monotonous. 

When you strip away all the pretend almost-sex scenes, you're left with a fairly short and somewhat clumsy coming out movie. One where plot and characters are much less important than ensuring every male character has one full frontal shot and ends up jerking off in bed with Kevin. 

Despite being obviously less than impressed with the movie I actually kind of like it. Not sure why when the best thing I can say about it is that given what is presumably a low budget, it doesn't look or sound too bad. The movie is certainly pointless and arguably dumb, but it isn't terrible quality wise, and there's a certain charm to it.

Very minor vaguely positive notes aside, I do not recommend seeing this unless the only thing you require from a "gay flick" is an occasional flaccid penis shot and fake porn scenes. Although if this is the case, you'd be better off just watching real porn. 

Women:

Two. Girlfriend and a friend. Three if you count a woman who doesn't really have lines as much as moans, and seems to have been hired for the size of her breasts.

People of color:

One.

Gratuitous nudity:

Full frontal for all! Well, all the male actors anyway. 

• Director: David Lewis
• Writer: David Lewis
• Actors: Jacob Newton, Derek Villanueva, Dylan Vox, Kevin Held
• 75 min
• IMDB