Chasing Pavement (US 2015)

The Gist:

A well known successful gay porn star who is making plans to leave the industry needs a new roommate. A Japanese immigrant looking to break into the tech industry needs a place to live. They move in together and realizations are made as boundaries are crossed. 

Comments:

The movie is okay. It's not really that bad, though it's also not exactly good either. 

Best thing is that there are some interesting ideas tossed around, such as the porn dude having submerged his 'real' self in favor of his porn persona for so long that there's nothing "real" left of him. He's just a shell of a person with all depth and humanity worn away. An interesting thought, though nothing much is done with it. 

A lot of the movie is like this, an idea is introduced, but not really addressed in much detail. 

Another issue is the dialogue. Everyone, especially the porn star lead speaks in the style of "listen to how  intelligent I am." Unfortunately it all comes off fake, since people, even smart people don'f talk like that ALL the time. It sounds like an expectation of what smart people sound like rather than how they actually speak. 

The stilted way he talks helps with the idea that the porn star is all artificial surface, though I'm not sure that was intentional. 

More oddness is how the porn star is supposedly leaving the industry to become a chef. Other than one line stating this, there's no indication it's happening. Well there is a scene  of him reading a text book, but for a would be chef, he rarely cooks or shows any interest in food. 

The subplot with the new roommate also goes against this leaving porn behind idea, since the new roomie is hired to work on putting together a website for the porn star's services to expand his "business." A job that results in the introverted, straight roomie watching porn staring his new extrovert gay roommate. A situation that leads exactly where you think it will lead. 

Issues and unsurprising story aside, not much happens here. People talk smart. Talk smart more. Then talk smart even more as everyone present, porn star's, friends, clients, and roommates all lead their lives of lies and artifice. 

So yeah, not terrible, just not overly interesting either. 

Women: 

There are two women in the movie, both seen from a distance voyeristly, one has some dialogue so following my rules of "counting as yes if it's a speaking role then, yes.... barely 

People of color: 

Yes. Very much so. One of the better things in the movie is that everyone isn't a white gay man. 

Gratuitous Nudity: 

butt shots and simulated sex

• Director: Matthew Doyle
• Writer: Mathew Doyle
• Actors: Remy Mars, Tokio Sasaki, Antonio Biaggi
• 82 min
• IMDB

$30 (US 1999)

The Gist:

For his sixteenth birthday, Scott’s father gives him the gift of an hour with a prostitute (young Sarah Gilbert).

Comments 

A short film where we have a closeted boy being given a prostitute for his sixteenth birthday by his apparently clueless father. Clueless because the father has no idea about his son. The "present" is not some sort of perverse "cure" for gayness, but rather something the father feels is normal to do for his son to become a "man."

The situation is messed up and the movie acknowledged this as the kid and prostitute talk and make a connection.

It tells a lot in it's short timespan and is worth a watch. 

Women:

One (out of three roles)

People of color:

No

Gratuitous nudity:

No

• Director: Gregory Cooke
• Writer: Christopher Landon
• Actors: Sara Gilbert, Erik MacArthur, Gregory Itzin
• Short film
• 20 min
• IMDB

Best Day Ever (US 2014)

The Gist: 

Facing a midlife crisis on turning fifty, David examines his life and considers ending his current unfulfilling relationship in a favor a starting something new with man he just met who is fifteen years his junior. 

Comments:

A man dealing with a midlife crisis and dealing with his own hangups about dating younger men has potential to be interesting. This movie however doesn't quite make it the entire way to interesting, stalling out somewhere between "meh" and melodrama. 

Part of the problem is casting and writing. David, the man turning fifty, has a boyfriend described as being financially successful, but what we actually onscreen see is an actor who seems miscast in the role and who despite (or maybe due to) saying things like "this deal is coming together," shows no actual evidence of having money. The only part of his characterization that comes through is that he's such a terrible jerk that the conclusion of the movie (stay with boyfriend or leave him) is never in question.  

Another problem is that the boyfriend is not the only inconsistent character. The lead simultaneously wants to have money and also doesn't care about money,  content to “merely” be okay and make movies (he's an indie filmmaker). However, instead of coming off as a real conflicted person, he just comes off as a wishy washy not entirely well written character. 

The main issue though is that while seeming a very personal, being an indie movie about an indie filmmaker, it feels very separated from any actual real life experiences. At least in terms of of the lead's personal life and relationships. He doesn't want to date a younger man, but why? He's settled for being in a "bad" relationship, but why? Has being part of a generation of gay men where AIDS happened right as they came of age affected his expectations of getting older? 

There are no answers provided.

There's potential for an interesting movie about queer men facing life and relationships as they face life after 50, but again this movie doesn't quite reach that potential. 

Women:

No

People of color:

No

Gratuitous nudity:

Quick butt shot

• Director: Jeff London
• Writer: James Handshoe, Jeff London
• Actors: Mel England, Tom Saporito
• 82 Minutes
• IMDB

Hurricane Bianca: From Russia with Hate (US 2018)

The Gist:

In the previous Hurricane Bianca movie,  a teacher who had been fired for being gay got revenge on his nemesis Debbie, via his drag persona Bianca. This time around Debbie is back in town and comes up with her own overly complicated plot for revenge, sending Bianca to Russia where she will be sent to a gulag for the crime of being gay.

Comments: 

The movie is terrible. The first flick wasn't very good either, but it at least managed to hover on the edge between being bad and merely meh due to having an actual plot, almost having something to say about discrimination against the LGBTQ community, and a certain odd naive charm (mainly due to being new). 

Those mild positives are all missing here, leaving the sequel a mess of not particularly funny, obvious jokes and odd situations that throw out any idea of resembling reality. 

The movie has several throw away guest appearances (Wanda Sykes, Sally Jessie Raphael) and adds new RuPaul Drag Race queens to the mix, including Katya. I normally love Katya, but not so much here. Her normal style of stream of consciousness humor is only evident in outtakes shown during the credit sequence. During the actual movie she doesn't do very much despite being a relatively major character. 

Unless you have need to watch everything remotely Drag Race related, the movie is pretty much skippable.

Women: 

Yes 

People of Color: 

Yes

Gratuitous nudity: 

No 

• Director: Matt Kugelman
• Writer: Derek Hartley, Matt Kugelman
• Actors: Debra Ward, Richard Martinez, Brian McCook
• 85 minutes
• IMDB

Elijah's Ashes (US 2017)

The Gist:

In order to meet the demands of their father's will and not lose the family house, two brothers, one gay (but not too gay), and the other, a homophobic ass, must take their father’s ashes to be buried in another town, so drunken anger filled roadtrip ensues.

Comments (with spoilers because I can’t be bothered to generalize/hide boring plot points ) :

It seems there are lots of people who like this movie, finding it witty and fun. I found it ‘meh.’ Meaning that I didn't think the story was engaging or funny. An issue for a dark comedy. Thing is, if you can think of funny situations involving a road trip to transport ashes to a cemetery, you’re probably thinking of funnier things then happen here. It also doesn't help that the 'dark' aspect of comedy is thrown out at the very end for an attempted uplifting ending that doesn't entirely work and feels out of place. 

My main issue with the humor is the jerk homophobic brother is relentlessly so, so his dialogue is pretty much just an ongoing unstopping stream of bad gay jokes, mingled with misogynistic jokes. The character being an ass is not the issue. It's that the jokes go on and on to the point where the impact fades and he becomes not so much a shocking and outrageous terrible person as much as boring. 

The gay brother isn’t much more interesting. He’s played as the regular guy ‘straight man’ so to speak to the jerk brother’s crassness. His 'schtick' is that he’s dealing with internalized homophobia (spoiler) so has issues of his own to deal with. Something that could make him interesting, but doesn’t since the only thing done with this is have him try to sleep with a woman for some reason (another spoiler) and be withdrawn and dull. A detail which makes a recurring joke odd. Nearly every man they meet on the trip is not only gay but also  really ‘into’ the gay brother, which is not so much funny as unbelievable that anyone would be into such a sullen dud of man.

There is als a very problematic bit involving an overly long joke about a trans woman prostitute. Part of the "humor" is that everyone, jerk brother, gay brother and others, refer to her as “It.” So very funny... not. 

All a long way to say I did not find the movie funny or interesting, so the best I can say about it is that the acting is adequate.

Women:

Yes

People of color:

An Asian bartender and an African-American pimp. Yes, the hooker has a black pimp... 

Gratuitous nudity:

No

• Director: Ryan Barton-Grimley
• Writer: Ryan Barton-Grimley
• Actors: Ari Scheider, Ryan Barton-Grimley
• Time: 87 minutes
• IMDB 

Call me By Your Name (US 2017)

The Gist:

In the warm carefree summer days of 1983 in Northern Italy, seventeen year old Elio falls for his father’s latest grad student intern, confident charming Oliver.

Comments (with an attempt to minimize non-obvious spoilers):

As of this writing the movie is getting praise, nominations for awards, and is showing up on best movies of the year lists, deservedly so. Not absolute praise though. While largely loved by professional critics, I do know people who felt the pacing was far too slow.

I don't agree with this critique, but then again i've been known to like "slow" movies. At least I do  when done well and the pacing is for a purpose, which is the case here. The story mirrors the time it takes for the two young men to go from attraction, to hestant flirting, to love, in a manner that echoes summer itself, both languid stretched-out warm days and simultaneously far too short as the end of freedom and return to 'real life' looms ever closer.

So yes, this is not a fast paced sitcom romance dramedy. Rather it's a story of youth's summer love, that by definition must soon end leading to a sense of hesitation, desire and achingness throughout the story.

In addition to the critiques of length / boredom, there's also been criticism of the relationship itself, because of the ages of the protagonists, seventeen and twenty-four. Not surprising given the events unfolding at the movies time of release, of accusations against individuals and growing acknowledgement of a culture of sexual abuse by men in positions of power against women (and younger men).

Aside from them both being over the Italian age of consent, so both "legal," there's also the fact this is not a story of abuse of power, sexual or otherwise, but rather a love story. Granted they aren't the same age, but given the way Elio and Oliver are written and portrayed they aren't that far apart, in some ways being almost the same person, both filled with the arrogance of youth. Another complaint i've seen, that the leads aren't likeable enough.

Which well, they are both far too full of themselves, but again they are both young men from a certain background of higher education, of "comfortable" moneyed class, and again, young, so this is understandable.

This is starting to sound like I didn't like it very much which isn't correct. I thought the movie was great. One of the best of the year, It is beautiful, well acted, well directed, and also rather sensual, filling you as viewer with not only gorgeous imagery, but managing to convey a sense of smell, heat, and touch as well. Not an easy feat for a movie.

Some scenes, including a specific monologue and one that plays out over the closing credits were enough to bring tears to my eyes, and from the noises I heard, made several people in the audience I saw it with cry.

It is definitely worth seeing.

Women:

Yes

People of Color:

No

Gratuitous nudity:

There is some minor stuff happening, for both guys and girls, or more specifically one guy and one girl. Was it gratuitous? Possibly?

• Director: Luca Guadagnino
• Writer: James Ivory
• Actors: Armie Hammer, Timothée Chalamet Stuhlbarg 
• 132 minutes
• English, Italian, French
• Note: I’ve not read the book it is based on, so have no observations about the transition from word to film, but the movie did succeed in making me interested in reading it.
• IMDB

Gaydar (US 2002)

The Gist: 

Randy comes across the ultimate yard sale find, a “gaydar” gun that can tell if a person is gay or straight. Something that would come in handy in figuring out the facts about Jack, the cute man at work that everyone, gays and women alike, has a huge crush on. 

Comments:

A comedy short film where gaydar, the ability to tell if someone is gay or not, is not only real, it’s a goofy looking handheld appliance.  

There’s appearances by Charles Nelson Reilly and Jim J. Bullock, and the lead Terry Ray is amusing as our childish fey lead. In truth there’s not much to the story, just goofy silly fun.

Women:

Yes

People of color:

Yes

Gratuitous nudity:

No

• Director: Larry LaFond
• Writers: Larry LaFond, Terry ray
• Actors: Terry Ray, Bryan Dattilo, Charles Nelson Reily 
• Short film
• 20 minutes
• IMDB

Homo Heights (US 1998)

The Gist:

Gay icon Malcolm (Quentin Crisp), beloved by all the people of Homo Heights (an apparent all queer city) is not so secretly a prisoner of Maria Callous (Stephen Sorrentino), drag queen leader of the gay mafia.  

Malcolm wants to leave, womanizer Clementine (Lea Delaria) wants her old girlfriend Stella back. Stella wants her new girlfriend Blanche to be less annoying. Nerdy reporter Tootsie wants a scoop. 

Comments:

This is an odd duck of a movie. It is a high camp comedy that despite the implications of those adjectives is not merely loud and obnoxious, but also at times fairly calm and subdued. 

Calm being the result of casting of Quentin Crisp, who was in his late eighties at the time, and filled his his scenes with softness and muted elegance as he more or less plays himself, quoting Oscar Wild and acting somewhat bemused by everything around him as his character waits calmly to leave the earthly plane behind. 

Despite sounding like an odd combo, some of the best scenes here involve Crisp and Delaria playing off each other. There seems to be a genuine fondness between them. Stephen Sorrentino as Maria Callous is also amusing as the drag queen mafiosa. 

There's not much to the story, at least to the main story of holding Malcom against his will. While there's a bit more to the Clementine romance subplot, actual plot seems besides the point here, which is letting Quentin Crisp just be his fey self, interspersed with humorous scenes of lesbian dramedy and gangster drag queens.

The movie is quirky and doesn't entirely work, bouncing back and forth from loud and wacky to smooth and creamy, and yet I'm really fond of it. 

Women:

Yes

People of color:

A couple of drag queens 

Gratuitous nudity:

No

• Director: Sara Moore
• Writer: Sara Moore
• Actors: Quentin Crisp, Lea DeLaria, Stephen Sorrentino 
• 92 minutes
• IMDB

Bed Buddies (US 2016)

The Gist: 

Three best friends wake up from a night of drinking and realize they might have accidentally all slept with each other. 

Comments:

In this short film we have three men, best friends, waking up from a night of heavy drinking, to realize they’ve crossed the boundaries of friendship, so try to figure out what this means by talking about it. A lot. Which wouldn’t be a bad thing except that the dialogue drifts from things actual real people would say into monologues that while they sound deep and meaningful, also sound a bit fake.

While our boys tend to get a bit melodramatic about their situation, it is just sex after all, there is some merit to their freaking out over the possibility of screwing up their friendship. Unfortunately, the acting and writing dilutes this concern, so while the movie is cute and sexy, it feels like it could have been better.  

Women:

No

People of color:

One of a cast of four 

Gratuitous nudity:

Implied nudity along with implied sex 

• Director: Reid Waterer
• Writer: Reid Waterer
• Actors: Dylan Wayne Lawrence, Daniel Lipshutz, Enzo Nove
• T15 minutes
• Short film
• Color and Black & White
• IMDB

This Car Up (US 2003)

The Gist:

Two men, who both believe in chance or is it fate, have a chance encounter or was it fate?

Comments:

This is a short film told in a visually interesting style of having the screen split into four quadrants, allowing us to simultaneously see both men and their thoughts. Thoughts ruled by this idea of random chance / fate as shown by spinning slot machine wheels as they can’t stop thinking of their chance meeting.

The plot is essentially just the story of two men meeting, a simple ‘meet cute,’ but the visual trick makes it more interesting than it would have been otherwise. 

It’s cute. It’s short. It’s fun. 

Women:

Yes, barely. To be fair, other than the two men there are barely any roles, and even the two men barely speak. 

People of color:

No

Gratuitous nudity:

No

• Director: Eric Mueller
• Writer: Eric Muller
• Actors: Mike Booth, Brent Doylke
• Short film
• Note: the title is a reference to elevators 
• 16 minutes
• IMDB

Sauna of the Dead: A Fairy Tale (UK 2016)

The Gist:

A bored man goes to a bath house just in time for a zombie attack.

Comments:

A short film where we have men getting together for sex turning into a zombie horror story. Considering this setup I expected the movie to turn into a metaphor about AIDS. It didn’t, which I guess says more about me than the movie, specifically my age, that my first thought was of course a story like this would use zombies as metaphor either for AIDS or fear of AIDS.   

But again, it doesn't. There is metaphor happening, but for a much more modern (or not) issue of making a human connection instead of just using each other for meaningless sex, which could count as spoiler, but I’m deciding doesn’t since the movie broadcasts this idea fairly quickly early on in its short run time. 

I’m not a huge horror person, but this is done rather well and worth checking out. 

Women:

No

People of color:

Yes 

Gratuitous nudity:

No, everyone manages to keep a towel on, even when turned into flesh eating undead 

• Director: Tom Frederic
• Writer: Tom Frederic
• Actors: Tom Frederic, Kumar Muniandy
• Short film 
• 21 minutes
• IMDB 

Walk a Mile in my Prada’s (US 2011)

The Gist: 

An obnoxious homophobe and a gay man switch sexual orientations due to “christmas magic,” teaching the former straight man a much needed lesson about not being an ass, and the former gay man an unneeded lesson about love. Will they be able to change back before the straight dude gets married or will the change be permanent? Why should the audience care?

Comments:

The movie is terrible, almost painful to watch at times. While it has some lower budget movie issues, the real problem is with the plot and how it’s handled. 

In order for “switching places” stories to work there needs to be a balance, a sense of symmetry between the “lessons learned,” wherein the switched people discover sympathy for the hardships the other person faces from life. 

There is no symmetry here. Straight dude was a homophobic asshole. Being “gay” for a few days teaches him to release the hate and be a decent human being. 

A symmetrical story would require the gay dude to be an equally massive jerk who is shocked to discover that it’s okay to be straight. A ludicrous lesson, so instead he finds out he loves his boyfriend, which he already knew. Because there's nothing to his story he only pops up occasionally in the movie for dumb pointless jokes about straight men. 

Dumb pointless jokes being another annoying thing about the movie. That switching orientations doesn’t merely mean being attracted to a different sex but rather fulfilling outdated stereotypes. Presumably jokes where the punch line is that straight men drink beer and love to leer at women's breasts, while gay men drink cosmos and know how to cook, were meant to be funny. They aren't. 

Despite whatever good intentions the creators may have had, the result is a "gay" movie that feels somewhat homophobic and insulting to the audience. 

Women:

Yes

People of color:

Yes

Gratuitous nudity:

Sort of 

• Director: Joey Sylvester
• Writer: Rick Karatas (aka Rick Sudi Karatas)
• Actors: Nathaniel Marston, Tom Archdeacon, Tom Arnold
• 87 minutes
• IMDB

Floating Skyscrapers (Płynace wieźowce) ( Poland 2013)

The Gist:

Kuba, a young man who has trained most of his life to be a professional swimmer, meets and falls in love with another man, throwing his regimented, aggressively controlled life, including his relationships with his mother and girlfriend, into chaos. 

Comments (with an unspecific spoiler that's still a spoiler): 

Set in Warsaw this is apparently one of the first Polish movies to deal with being gay which may explain why while it is contemporary, it feels very old fashioned and somewhat outdated, being a story where coming out MUST lead into a painful situation that can only end badly. 

I don't know enough to comment on the state of Polish gay culture, but it does feel like there are phases that local queer cinema goes through and if this movie is an indication, they are still in a phase where, regardless of reality, in popular entertainment at least, happiness and living openly are seen as incompatible. A phase now past for the most part in American movies. 

That aside, the story is told well as we see Kuba attempting to deal with accepting what he wants in love and life with another man verses his actual life with his girlfriend and overly dependent mother. 

The movie is also beautiful to look at, dominated by an urban landscape all grays and blues. 

It's also rather sexual in a no nonsense realistic manner. So the answer to my continual question of does a movie fill the gay flick stereotype of having pointless  gratuitous nudity, is a resounding "maybe."  There's plenty of naked bodies in gym showers and during sex scenes here, but is it strictly unneeded if it helps tell the story? Then again if it had been told without nudity would it have been the same story? 

All in all it would be worth a watch if you have not yet burned out on sad coming out stories.

Women: 

Yes

People of Color: 

No

Gratuitous nudity: 

Maybe? There's plenty of nudity, both male and female, and as I write this I consider it as an artist choice but I could see an argument against this opinion. 

• Director: Tomasz Wasilewski
• Writers: Tomasz Wasilewski
• Actors: Mateusz Banasiuk, Marta Nierdkiewicz, Bartosz Geiner
• 93 minutes 
• in Polish
• IMDB

Unsolved Suburbia (US 2010)

The Gist:

Bisexual high school student Marty and his friends try to solve the case of who shot their friend Eddie while Eddie was in a car making out with his boyfriend Thomas.

At least that’s more or less the plot description I’ve found online. The movie I saw fell more along the lines of: 

No one tries to solve an attempted murder. We eventually get told what happened by someone who wasn’t there and would have no way of knowing what happened. Characters who are supposed to be in high school and may or or may not be of legal age take off their clothes a lot for no reason. 

Comments with spoilers because I don't care: 

So we have a sort of film noir wanna-be murder mystery where there is no actual murder and no one takes on the detective role trying to solve the case of “Who tried to kill Eddie, his angry gangbanger brother or Eddie’s boyfriend’s angry gangbanger brother?" 

A movie where teenagers, both boys and girls, take their clothes off for no reason. One where character after character after character is introduced yet they all don’t seem to be in the same movie, some are in a mobster flick, some are in a high school teen sex comedy, others in an “I can’t accept my gay family member because I’m ethnic” coming out melodrama, others in a gang banger movie, and yet others are in a teen angst drama. 

A movie where characters are all written to operate in only one of two modes, weepy sad or mean bitch, and yet none of the actors have enough skill to pull either off, settling into a medium of whiny cranky. 

So yeah, this thing is a huge mess with numerous problems including an overly confusing and ultimately boring story that feels like it took several hours to tell despite only being an hour or so long. 

Women:

Yes

People of color:

Yes

Gratuitous nudity: 

Yes, both "teenage" boys and girls drop clothes for no reason

• Director: Cheetah Gonzalez (aka Steven Vasquez) 
• Writers: Jeremy Huntington, Cheetah Gonzalez (aka Steven Vasquez) 
• Actors: Johnny Lockhart, Steven Christopher, Aleksandr Dissan, David Blanco
• 65 minutes
• IMDB

4th Man Out (US 2015)

The Gist:

On his 24th birthday, a “regular” dude comes out of the closet as gay, throwing his unsuspecting close knit circle of male friends into confusion as they figure out the new status quo. 

Comments:

“Regular” guy comes out as gay confusing his clueless friends and family who all assumed he was straight because he was not feminine is not an uncommon sub-genre of gay films. Unfortunately most of them spend an inordinate amount of time avoiding dealing with the actual queer person in favor of how his news affects all the straight people around him. In other words in this type of the movie the gay man is usually only a minor character in his own movie, so it ends being all about straight angst, and boring as a result. 

This movie is better than most, because while it doesn’t avoid straight angst, it does expand the scope of focus to have two protagonists, both the straight and gay best friends, so in addition to straight angst we have a heavy large dose of gay angst as well. Which sounds like an insult but isn’t intended to be. 

This is emotional drama story time, so angst is a “good” thing here , and not forgetting the movie is actually about a gay man makes it more interesting than most, letting us see our newly out gay mechanic deal with dating men and figuring out how his friendships have changed, as well as showing his straight best friend do the same. 

The movie is totally predictable, with no surprises, and yet it ends up being fairly good, and worth a watch if you’re in the mood for warm hearted drama.

Women:

Yes 

People of color: 

A couple  of very minor roles 

Gratuitous nudity:

No 

• Director: Andrew Nackman
• Writer: Aaron Danncik
• Actors: Parker Young, Evan Todd, Chord Overstreet
• 86 minutes
• IMDB

Birthday Cake (U.S. 2013)

The Gist:

In Los Angeles, Studio City to be specific, two men who both work in the “Industry” (i.e., “Hollywood”), prepare to throw their baby daughter a birthday party. Because they live wacky hijink filled lives, the party will be swamped with wacky relatives, crazy friends, clowns, and a documentary film crew. 

Comments:

The conceit of the movie is that it is a documentary about two gay men and their family as they prepare to throw a birthday party for their baby daughter. What this means is we as viewer get treated to a series of fast comedic skits, all apparently improvised rather than tightly scripted. Unfortunately the quality of the skits/scenes vary from okay to meh to boring.  

The movie almost works when it doesn’t forcefully try to be funny, focusing instead on "honest" moments between the couple and daughter. Too bad that rather slim core of almost good is surrounded by numerous scenes of uninteresting “Industry” jokes and people aiming for wacky but hitting boring instead. 

The movie is a sequel to a short film Groom's Cake (which I haven't seen and have no comments about).  

Women: 

Yes

People of color: 

Some

Gratuitous nudity: 

No

• Director: Chad Darnell
• Writer: Chad Darnell
• Actors: Chad Darnell, Rib Hillis
• 85 min
• IMDB

Chef's Special (Fuera de Carta) (Spain 2008)

The Gist:

Maxi, an out gay chef focused on getting a Michelin star for his restaurant has his life thrown into chaos when his children from a failed marriage move in with him right at the same time a rather famous and handsome football (soccer) player moves in next door. 

Comments:

Poking around online it seems that some people are annoyed by the movie's politically incorrect humor and/or by the fact that protagonist Maxi is far from butch. 

The main, though not sole, issue people seem to have with the humor is that the protagonist's father spends the entire movie continually telling crude homophobic jokes. It's used as proof of his being an asshole, but even so the joke wear thin pretty quick. 

As for the fem lead, well, not every gay dude is a mountain of stereotypical masculinity. Gay equals sissy can get problematic if a single character is meant to represent the entire community, the whole wide spectrum of "gay" to the exclusion of everyone else. Something that isn't going on here. While some of the humor does come from the fact he's a bit swishy, for the most part it is not a joke, but rather just who he is. 

Following the "rules" of gays plus kids equals family storylines, Maxi's children, well, at least the older brother, spends most of the movie being a bratty jerk, though the writing is good enough that unlike other movies with similar storylines, the boys behavior actually makes some sense. 

Despite what seems to be a growing list of problems, I actually likes the movie. It's not exactly great cinema, but it is fun and manages to make some well used worn out storylines entertaining,  if you don't mind non-PC humor that is. 

Women: 

Yes

People of Color: 

No

Gratuitous Nudity: 

No

• Director: Nacho G. Velilla
• Writer: Oriol Capel, David S. Olivas
• Actors: Javier Cámara, Lola Dueñas,Fernando Tejero
• Spanish
• 111 min
• IMDB

Hurricane Bianca (U.S. 2016)

The Gist:
A science teacher moves from New York to Texas, where he almost immediately gets fired for being gay. He just as quickly gets himself rehired while dressed in drag pretending to be a woman in order to get revenge; oh, and also to manage to be the only teacher to get through to the worst kids in school.


Comments:
From what I’d heard about the movie from people who saw it in real life I was expecting it to be horrible, so I was surprised when it turned out to be just regular run of the mill independent-low-budget movie average level of bad.


A shame really, since there are interesting ideas here and it touches on trans issues as well as pointing out that the lack of LGBT rights in many states makes discrimination legal. Unfortunately, the writing, as well as lots of the acting skills, are not up to task of handling these subjects. Ultimately, the movie ends up a bit mediocre because it embraces far too many cheap movie clichés and stereotypes, seemingly unable to be, or perhaps not wanting to be, anything better than a generic throw away ‘flick.’


In the end the only reason to see it is if you’re a fan of Bianca and RuPaul’s Drag Race, since some of the contestants/queens make appearances here as well as some other known faces. Some such as Deborah Ward appear to be trying hard, but don’t have enough to work with to make the movie succeed. Others have no real acting skills, then there's William who seem to be sleepwalking through the movie. Finally we have Bianca, who actually isn't that bad. She's good enough that I’d like to see her, in or out of drag, trying out something better written than this.


Women:
Yes


People of Color:
Two, including Bianca


Gratuitous nudity:
Yeah

• Director: Matt Kugelman
• Writer: Matt Kugleman
• Actors: Roy Haylock, Lola Botha, Wiliam Belli, D.J. 'Shangela' Pierce, Deborah Ward
• 84 min
• IMDB

The Second Coming (U.S. 1995)

The Gist:

In the near future the United States is speeding towards fascism, and a bullied gay high school student named Carlos joins the youth resistance movement, creating videos exposing the truth of the take over of the government by Right Wing Christian Terrorists. 

Comments:

The plot explanation makes this seem like an exciting action adventure flick, which it is not. Art film with all the implications of style being much more important than production quality, acting skills or plot is a more acurate description. Though to be fair, there is an actual plot here. A very thin plot involving conspiracies, but it is there. 

One of the conspiracies involves REX 84, a plan to suspend the constitution and declare martial law.  If you're old enough to remember Oliver North and the Iran Contra hearings, or have heard talk of FEMA concentration camps, REX 84 is this idea of herding up dissident citizens, feared as true for the extremes of both the paranoid far left and far right. 

In addition to conspiracies, the movie compares the homophobia and racism of modern day (mid-1990's) American culture to the rise of power of the nazis in Germany. Sadly, an analogy that is still relevant, even more so given that I'm writing this in the final days of the 2016 presidential elections with Donald Trump being embraced by the KKK and right wing nationalist groups.

Despite having interesting elements, the story told in such a art movie / experimental / movie school "Who cares about quality as long as I get to the TRUTH" manner that most of the movie is barely watchable and ends up  something I wouldn't recommend without a huge mile long list of caveats. 

Women: 

Yes

People of Color: 

Yes

Gratuitous nudity: 

Yes, although given that it occurs alongside violence I'd accept that the intention was not salacious but rather a desire to shock.  

• Director: Jack Walsh
• Writer: K.M. Soehnlein, Jack Walsh
• Actors: Al Giordano, Jeff Constan
• 55 min
• Black and White 
• IMDB

If Dad Only Knew (Original title: Outing Riley) (U.S. 2004)

The Gist:

Bobby, an Irish Catholic "straight acting" closeted gay dude who lies about being straight to the point he even has a "beard" (a fake girlfriend), decides to come out to his brothers after their father dies. They don't believe him.

Comments: 

This movie is proof that gay sensibility exists, because it totally lacks one. A roundabout way of saying that the creators are straight and it shows. Not because Bobby is a "straight acting" bro who is so straight acting that he likes looking at naked women. Rather it's because of what works vs what doesn't work in the movie. Bobby and his brothers being privileged over aged frat boys is more than believable. What doesn't work is pretty much anything about "the gay." Except for one thing that is. The eldest brother, a catholic priest having issues with Bobby being gay, does make sense. 

There is no rule that a straight person cannot make a "gay movie," but if you are going to make something outside of your first hand experience and knowledge, it would help if you learned about the subject and didn't approach it half heartedly. In this case one aspect of half heartedly means topless women treated as sex objects, presumably there to compensate for this being a gay flick. Thing is, with that word "gay" you'd expect men to also be sex objects, at least when gay Bobby is involved. They're not. The only time men's bodies are acknowledged, it's for comedy. 

Given the large focus on Bobby's family coming to terms with his being gay, this is arguably not a gay story for actual gays, but rather a 'regular' movie with a gay storyline for 'straight' audiences. But even if this is the case, they've gone overboard in making it 'palatable' so we are now actually catering to bro dudes. 

Another problem is Bobby's habit of breaking the fourth wall and talking to the camera. It fails not only because it's not interesting, but also because of the way it's done, framed as "I wish my life were a movie" so his monologues could be him acknowledging this is just a movie, or it could just be that he has an overactive imagination. Like the gay aspects of the movie, it feels like they didn't fully commit to the idea. 

Ignoring the how's of what is being told, what is being told is a simple coming out story where the protagonist's family has issues with acceptance. The 'wrinkle' being that his family doesn't believe him at first because he's "normal." The problem here is that having a 'regular dude' gay lead is not as unusual as the the people involved making the movie seem to think it is. 

The acting and production are acceptable resulting in a movie that is 'whatever.'

In the end I guess my primary issue is that despite supposedly being a gay coming out story, it's actually a straight teen sex comedy. Only with thirty and forty something year-old adults who act like teenagers, no sex, a lead who is gay, but not too gay, and with lady boobs tossed in to make up for that miniscule amount of gay. Not really a combination of words I'm interested in. 

Women: 
The protagonist's plot-moving-forward sister and his fake girlfriend.

People of color:
"In story" everyone in Chicago is white.  During a breaking the fourth wall sequence however, one of the crew members is African American. 

Gratuitous nudity: 
Yes. Topless women and a couple of male butts, though as mentioned in the comments, in this movie women are meant to be ogled, while men's bodies are things to laugh at.

• Director: Pete Jones
• Writer: Pete Jones
• Actors: Pete Jones, Nathan Fillion, Stoney Westmoreland, Julie Pearl
• 99 min
• Note: I found no explanation for the title change from 'Outing' to 'Knowing.' Admittedly I did not spend much time looking for an answer. Presumably the newer title, being more 'heartfelt' would attract more viewers, as well as being less obviously "gay"
• IMDB