The Books of John (US 2007)

The Gist:

John (of the title) dies while writing in his diary (the books of the title) setting up a situation where his surviving partner Frank goes off in search of John's hidden past and in doing so finds a way to move on with his life and perhaps a new love. Also, Frank's young gay male friends worry that he's spending too much time morning and not enough time partying, and so are punished for being jerks. 

Comments (with Spoilers):

In a word, the movie was bad. 

The acting varied from okay to poor, and the quality of production (sound, filming, editing,...) varied as well, but even if you can ignore issues common to low budget movies, the bizarreness of the story can't be easily glossed over. 

The main story of the movie involves Frank reading his dead lover John's diaries and going to Alabama to find out about Dead John's childhood (While alive John was tight lipped about his past). 

Once in Dead John's podunk hometown, Frank immediately meets / has sex / starts a relationship with New Guy. During this courtship, everyone says things like how Dead John must be watching over Frank, and has brought him and New Guy together (via his dairies). Except that it turns out there is an obvious connection between Dead John and New Guy, so saying that Dead John is responsible for getting them together is a little creepy. 

There's also a subplot involving two of Frank's younger gay friends, a couple who are written as shallow and dumb, and for the crime of being shallow and dumb (thinking that morning for your dead lover should not interfere with partying) they get punished with HIV, setting off melodrama. Unfortunately involving some of the weaker actors, so poorly acted melodrama. 

Given all the technical issues and odd story, in the end, it's not worth watching. 

Women:

Several, mainly Frank's lesbian friends, who except for Frank's best friend, don't get to do very much. 

People of Color: 

Several, mainly Frank's lesbian friends, and one half of the shallow young(ish) gay couple. 

Gratuitous nudity:

Some skin and a quick flash of bare butt. Compared to the standard stereotype of gay flicks, this movie is almost modest.

• Directors: David A. Schweiger, L.W. Smith
• Writers: David A. Schweiger, L.W. Smith
• Actors: Forrest Bankston, Jeff Batton
• 89 min
• IMDB

Bear Cub (Cachorro) (Spain 2004)

The Gist:

Pedro, content his life of friends and lovers, and most importantly no serious commitments, agrees to help his sister by taking care of his nephew Bernardo for two weeks while she is in India for a trip. When circumstances require Bernardo to stay longer, the boy's grandmother comes into the picture threatening to break up the new found bond between uncle and nephew and their fledgling family. 

Comments:

I've mentioned the "gays plus a kid makes a family" subgenera here before. This is sort of the same idea, but with a determinedly single man in place of a troubled gay couple and without the cliche of having the kid be a homophobic jerk. Actually, several gay flick cliches are avoided, resulting in a movie dealing frankly with sex, drugs, and AIDS amongst other issues. 

It's well done and worth a watch. Especially so if you're into bears of the big hairy man variety.

Women:

Family, neighbors, schoolmates. In other words, it does not ignore half the population. 

People of color:

Nope

Gratuitous nudity:

The movie starts off with a rather revealing "bear on bear" sex scene, so yeah, there's definitely skin of the big hairy man variety.

• Director: Miguel Albaladejo 
• Writers: Miguel Albaladejo
• Actors: Jose Luis Garcia Perez, David Castillo
• 99 min
• Spanish
• IMDB

Eleven Men Out (Strákarnir Okkar) (Iceland 2005)

The Gist:

Ottar Thor, a star football (soccer) player comes out of the closet during a magazine interview in order to improve the odds of his being the cover story. He gets the cover, but is also kicked off the team as well. While dealing with the repercussions, he joins a gay amateur football (soccer) team and soon enough they will play an exhibition game against his old team, on gay pride day appropriately enough. 

Not really spoilery comments: 

While from the description it sounds exactly like the "Outted athlete joins a gay team to victory" sub genre of gay movie I've joked about before, this doesn't quite exactly follow the path laid out for it. 

For one thing, for a sports movie, very few games are actually played. Another reason, an unfortunate one, is that it spends quite a lot of time with how other people, his friends and family, deal with Ottar's announcement of being gay, rather focusing clearly on him. Unfortunate, because it was a bit annoying watching his parents and others freaking out about how his being gay would negatively affect their lives.

The division of time spent on Ottar's vs everyone else also means that by the end of the movie, he remains the same vague and undefined jerk as he is at the beginning. 

Interestingly, this is not a romanticized view of Iceland. As seen here the entire country is cold, dark, and wet from near constant downpours, and there is little to do other than get drunk. Not exactly a tourist board postcard view. 

In the end it's not a bad movie, just one that ends up being a little boring. 

Women: 

Yes

People of color: 

Some

Gratuitous nudity:

Locker room shots

• Director: Róbert I. Douglas
• Writer: Róbert I. Douglas
• Actors: Björn Hlynur Haraldsson, Helgi Björnsson, Arnmundur Ernst Björnsson
• 85 min
• IMDB

KickOff (UK 2010)

The Gist:

A gay 5 man Sunday football (soccer) league team, whose members all have issues to deal with, are about to play their first game. Unfortunately it's against the toughest bad rep team in the league (whose members also all have issues to deal with).

Comments:

The movie has many elements that should have made me love it: a large multicultural cast, varied sexuality, it's loud and bright, and sharp yet playful. Instead I just thought it was barely ok. 

Unfortunately instead of coming off as natural and a reflection of the real world, it  feels formulaic and kind of preachy. Every footballer has an issue to work through, and each one is given time to do so, leading to a story juggling drugs, internalized homophobia, questions of paternity, metrosexual-phobia, and more, and more, and more, to the point that the repetitiveness of looping subplots gets a little exhausting. So much is going on (and quickly resolved) that it's difficult to care about anyone.

Still, it's not a bad movie, just a really weak one.  Rikki Beadle Blair is the best thing in it, although in the end, watching him play a fey, gay dad of an angst-y teen made me wish I were instead watching him play a fey, gay dad of an agnst-y teen in Metrosexuality (a great British TV show).

Women:

Yes

People of color:

Yes

Gratuitous nudity:

One joke scene

• Director: Rikki Beadle Blair
• Writer: Rikki Beadle Blair
• Actors: Duncan MacInnes, Ian Sharp, Ludvig Bonin, Rikki Beadle Blair
• 99 min
• IMDB

My Girlfriend's Boyfriend (U.S. 1999)

The Gist:

An up and coming actor is about to marry his girlfriend, much to the annoyance of his boyfriend. A bumbling straight man is convinced to play gay as an excuse to skip out on the aforementioned wedding without facing dire consequences from his boss / girlfriend. A would-be paparazzi photographs something she shouldn't have. Which all mixed together doesn't add up to the sum of it's parts. 

Comments:

The movie wants to be a witty "Oscar Wilde-ian" farce by way of a Rock Hudson/Doris Day movie with a light dose of slap-stick comedy. While good to be ambitious, the people involved unfortunately don't manage to pull it off, and instead ended up with a slap-stick comedy that is not as "smart" as it thinks it is. 

It is also, despite being included in various lists of gay flicks, not exactly a "gay movie." The (frankly unlikable) gay couple are actually minor characters here. The real protagonist is the clumsy straight man, and thus this is actually a hetero love story, where the setting happens to be a marriage between a closeted actor and his unsuspecting bride.

If doors hitting people in the face knocking them unconscious is your kind of comedy, this might be worth watching. If that's not the definition of hilarity for you, then this is probably not worth the effort.

Women:

Several 

People of color:

None

Gratuitous nudity:

None. Though there are scenes with women in nighties if that's the way you "roll."

• Director: Kenneth Schapiro
• Writer: Kenneth Schapiro
• Actors: Deborah Gibson, Sean Runnette, Jill Novick, Valerie Perrine, Chris Bruno
• 81 min
• IMDB

Can't Stop The Music (U.S. 1980)

The Gist:

Heterosexual songwriter Jack (Steve Guttenberg) needs to put together a band to showcase his music. His heterosexual female roommate, former supermodel Samantha (Valerie Perrine) decides to help. Newly arrived in New York, heterosexual lawyer Ron (Bruce Jenner), wanting to woo Samantha, helps as well. Together they gather a group of eclectic heterosexual men and form the famous heterosexual disco music singing group, the Village People.

Comments: 

The movie is a very campy musical made during that brief time in 1980 when people thought the 80's would be 70's sexual liberation continued to a disco beat, not realizing everything was about to change. The story is dumb/silly, the acting ranges from bad to worse, it's all manner of terrible. So terrible that it swings into fun to watch territory.  

One of the things I find interesting about it is that everyone in it is straight. Well, maybe not the Leather Man, but ostensively all the other men are intended to be hetero. Quite a feat, considering the movie is about the Village People (although in truth they are only minor characters in their own movie). 

Despite doing things like writing hit disco songs about the YMCA, being utterly uninterested in his supermodel best friend, or any woman at all, other than his mother that is, Jack has a line about chasing stewardesses, proving he is straight. The "Construction Worker" dreams of fame and women (abet in a musical dream sequence). The "Indian," who spends his time half naked, "gets it on" with Samantha's female best friend. Heck, the main focus of the movie is the hetero romance between Ron and Samantha. 

People sing, they dance, they hang out nude in the hot tub of the YMCA, and yet they are all straight. Which oddly enough, makes everything even gayer, because this is the freaking Village People after all, who are so uber-gay that they negate all attempts at heteronormalizing all characters present.

Despite the throw away lines and plot points assuring the audience that all the male characters are safely straight, they all end up feeling like they're one day shy of coming out of the closet. Had there been a sequel it would have featured Jack, his boyfriend, and the now divorced Samantha attending the wedding of her ex-husband Bruce Jenner and the Leather Man (who was impossible to stuff into the closet in the first place).

It's a silly movie with outlandish numbers, a few Village People songs, and worth a watch if you like bad campy movies. 

Women:

Yes.

People of color:

Yes.

Gratuitous nudity:

Technically yes. During the YMCA routine there's brief flashes of naughty bits.

• Director: Nancy Walker
• Writers: Bronte Woodard, Allan Carr
• Actors: Valerie Perrine, Bruce Jenner, Steve Guttenberg, and assorted Village People: Ray Simpson, David Hodo, Felipe Rose, Randy Jones, Glenn Hughes, Alex Briley
• 124 min
• IMDB

eCupid (U.S. 2011)

The Gist:

In a fairy tale for a social media age, we have Marshall, a man about to turn 30 who is unfulfilled by his job, and uncertain about his seven year relationship that has settled into being comfortable. Bored one night, he downloads an app, "eCupid," which promises to find him true love. The apparently omnipotent app proceeds to give Marshall exactly what he desired, life as a single man, with a string of hot men vying for his attention. Given everything he wants, why can he only think of his now ex-boyfriend Gabe?

Comments (with unimportant spoilers):

The answer to why he can only think of his boyfriend Gabe is obvious of course. It's because this is a moral lesson teaching romantic comedy with fairy tale overtones and a mobile phone app in place of an ornery genie granting your every wish to disaster. 

It is a perfectly adequate, perfunctory, "gay flick," that does exactly what it promises to do, be cute. No more, no less.

Which oddly is the worst problem with it. This feels like it was aimed squarely for average and having achieved that, "they" have ended up up with a fast food meal of a movie. Neither good nor bad, not surprising, and oddly lacking. 

General comments aside and focusing on the story, It's a bit strange that when the boyfriend Gabe receives a text saying Marshall was bored with the relationship, instead of getting mad, or having a fight, or just talking about it, Gabe immediately breaks up with him ending their seven year relationship over momentary boredom. 

Issues of 'adequacy' aside, the movie is what is. A gay flick that is cute if you watch it, but is not a loss if you don't.

Women:

One. Morgan Fairchild as, well, a mysterious and possibly powerful someone who knows a thing or two about love. Actually, considering the movie's name is eCUPID, it may have made more sense if her role was cast with a man instead. Likely the first and last time I ever argue that a gay flick would had been better with fewer women, which in this case would mean no women. 

People of color:

None

Gratuitous nudity:

None

• Director: J.C. Calciano
• Writer: J.C. Calciano
• Houston Rhines, Noah Schuffman
• 95 min
• IMDB

Why not me? (Pourquoi pas moi?)(France 1999)

The Gist:

A group of 20-something, lesbian and gay, French expat friends living in Barcelona decide to finally stop lying and come out to their parents. Further, they figure the best way to do this is at all at once at a party for mutual support, both for themselves, and their parents as well. Little do they realize that the drama they were expecting, of potential parental disapproval, would be the least of what happens that night. 

Comments:

It's a cute fun movie with a large cast. Hmm, considering we are talking about a lothario lesbian in danger of running out of available women in Barcelona, a football (soccer) playing gay man 'crushing' on a team member, a Star Wars obsessed woman, her educated-to-the-point-of-unemployable girlfriend, a "straight but not narrow" secretary, all their parents (who are another long list of attributes and quirks), and all their potential love interests, make that a very large cast. 

There's a "Almodóvar-lite" feel to the movie, with the brightness of it, strong female roles, wild coincidences, and high drama, though admittedly, not with the same quality or skill. It also plays with elements of fantastic realism, but in the end the main qualities that struck me were again, that it was cute and fun. 

It's worth a watch.

Women:

Many. 

People of color:

A couple.

Gratuitous nudity:

Extremely minor.

• Director: Stéphane Giusti
• Writer: Stéphane Giusti
• Actors: Amira Casar, Julie Gayet, Bruno Putzulu, Alexandra London
• 96 min
• French, Spanish
• IMDB

Fruit fly (U.S. 2009)

The Gist:

Bethesda, a performance artist, moves to San Francisco for a six month stay to work on her next piece, a variant of the work she habitually returns to, her desire to find her biological mother. While in the city she makes a new family of friends, and in getting a new gay best friend, gains the label "fag hag" much to her initial annoyance. Also, being a musical, people sing and perform as the city is filled with the lights and tinny sounds of 6 bit games. 

Comments:

From an interview I read, the story goes that while promoting an earlier film they'd worked on, whenever H.P. Mendoza (Writer/Director) and L.A. Renigen (Bethesda)  'hit' a LGBT festival, men would automatically assume that she was a fag hag. This oddity prompted an idea that turned into Fruit Fly. 

It's not your standard musical. Many scenes were filmed in gorilla style, that is, on public streets and locations on the sly without permits. People sing about public transportation, teenage angst, hooking up, and 'workshop-ing' their lives to tunes intentionally reminiscent of old video games. Instead of grandiose story of large massive events with a definitive dramatic conclusion, this is more of a character piece where life happens.

From what I remember, (professional) reviews tended to be mixed, but personally I really like it. The movie is fun and filled with energy and light, and features people who (in gender, race, age, and sexuality) would normally be ignored in most movies. 

Regardless of my opinion, if the inherent goofiness of people breaking out into song is off putting to you, or alternatively, if you are a strong musical fan who can't stand when actors don't have strong voices, then it wouldn't be worth watching. 

On the other hand, if quirky oddball movies with a strong sense of style and place are your kind of thing, then it's worth a watch. 

Women:

Many 

People of color:

Many 

Gratuitous nudity:

Nope

• Director: H.P. Mendoza
• Writer: H.P. Mendoza
• Actors: L.A. Renigen, Mike Curtis, Theresa Navarro, E.S. Park, H.P. Mendoza
• 94 min
• Musical
• IMDB

Just A Question Of Love (Juste Une Question D'Amour) (France 2000)

The Gist:

Laurent works very hard to convince his family that he is straight, even pretending his best friend is a serious girlfriend. His school work on the other hand, does not receive quite as much effort on his part, to the point that he is danger of flunking out of agricultural college. As a last chance he is given an internship working under a researcher, Cédric, sparking events that will bring family, truth, friendship, and love to a dramatic conclusion.

Comments (with an unsurprising spoiler):

The spoiler is this, the protagonist spends the majority of the movie repeatedly saying it will not go well when his parents and family finds out he is gay. His parents and family are repeatedly shown verifying that yes, they will react badly when they find out he is gay.

Given this, it's a bit much that characters (the same ones who'd been promoting his coming out) are surprised that Laurent's parents and family react badly when he finally comes out to them. 

That aside, it's well done. Not earth shattering good, but good enough. Although given that it is not merely a romance drama, but rather a coming out romance drama, a lot of time is spent with Laurent's parents dealing with his news which can get a bit tiresome, but overall still worth a watch. 

Women:

Mothers, aunts, family, friends, so in a word, yes.

People of color:

Nope

Gratuitous nudity:

Minor

• Director: Christian Faure
• Writer: Christian Faure, Annick Laboulette, Pierre Pauquet
• Actors: Cyrille Thouvenin, Stéphan Guérin-Tillié
• 88 min
• TV Movie
• French
• IMDB