Let My People Go (France 2011)

The Gist:

After a very bad day at work involving a dead man, a bag of money, and a huge fight with his boyfriend Teemu, Reuben leaves Finland to go home to Paris to his family and their assorted problems and strife just in time for Passover.

Comments:

This movie is an example of a “I’m both gay and ethnic, and ain’t that a hoot!” comedy. Think “My Big Fat Greek Wedding, but where the protagonist is gay and there (usually) isn’t a wedding. If done right, it can be amusing. If not done right, it can end up just a lazy collection of gay and ethnic jokes.

In this case the movie lays it on extremely heavy with the "I'm Jewish" humor, but for the most part it comes across as inoffensive in intent, as Reuben's family argue and grumble, providing most of the drama as he tries to deal with both them and his boyfriend. 

Ultimately it’s a cute, if unsubstantial, movie, with cute actors in unsubstantial roles. Not required viewing, but not bad if you do. I'd say something to play in the background while multitasking doing something else, but given that it is subtitled (dialogue is in Finish, French, and English) that may be a bit hard to do. 

Women:

Yes

People of Color:

Nope

Gratuitous nudity:

A couple of minor incidental butt shots

• Director: Mikael Buch
• Writers: Mikael Buch
• Actors: Nicolas Maury, Jarkko Niemi
• 96 min
• Finish, French, English
• IMDB

Altitude Falling (U.S. 2010)

The Gist:

Against a backdrop of a near future dystopian America that implants its citizens with ID tracking chips, an older man meets a younger guy (with connections to his past) and they fall in love. 

Comments:

The idea of the loss of secrecy due to technology is topic in need of discussion, but in this movie it ends up being boring. Part of the problem is that for a movie being sold as a suspenseful science fiction flick there is very little suspense or action. It also gets bogged down in some of the stereotypes of low budget movies such as bad acting. The young gay guy is very painful to watch at times. 

There's also the fact that more focus is given to the romantic pairing between older guy and young gay then the world they live in. Although this focus may not be surprising given that cross generational romance seems to be a common theme in writer/director/lead actor Paul Bright's movies. 

Even if you have no issues with someone dating a barely legal person more than young enough to be his son, this particular relationship is still questionable because as the story explains older guy is romancing the estranged son of his best friend (whom he also lusted for back in college).  Instead of a testament that when it comes to love, age doesn't matter, the details make the relationship seem creepy. 

Romance aside the oppressive government plot is also strange. Apparently in a decade or so the United States becomes a capitalist / communist / fascist dictatorship, where a female president passes laws directly, forcing people to ride bikes and grow their own food in federally run community gardens. Dialogue makes it seem that all these contradictory adjectives are an un-ironic comment on the Obama presidency (because using hope as a campaign slogan was bad?). 

In short, this is a whole lot of words to say that the movie is "meh."

Women:

The young gay's mother and grandmother

People of color:

If there were any, I blinked and missed them

Gratuitous nudity:

Maybe? I saw none, but an actual real review of the movie mentioned nudity. I saw it online so I guess that version was edited.

• Director: Paul Bright
• Writer: Paul Bright
• Actors: Paul Bright, William Diamond
• 93 min
• Note: The title is mentioned in dialogue as being a bit of Orwellian government double speak. In this global warming disaster affected near future it's not the oceans that are rising, but rather mountains (altitudes) that are lowering. 
• IMDB

The Man of My Life (L'Homme de sa Vie) (France 2006)

The Gist:

A French family holiday in a large house in Provence. As summer rolls on, the middle-aged husband becomes close friends with the middle aged openly gay neighbor, forming a relationship that as it deepens challenges the basic truths both men have built their lives on. 

Comments (with spoilers both minor and perhaps technically more than minor):

Looking around online it seems that some people hate this movie because of long conversations between the two leads as they discuss and argue about the nature of love, passion, and freedom; and mysterious (or at least odd) happenings, such as a strange breeze that forever blows through the kitchen.  All reasons that I liked it and rather enjoyed it. 

From the description and the fact it gets included in lists of gay films, the expectation is that the two male leads fall in love and this would nothing more than a coming out story set against some rather gorgeous scenery. What it actually is a lot more complicated then that and a much better movie because of that complexity. Well, better as long as long conversations about the nature of love, passion, and freedom don't bore you. If that sounds sounds dull, then the movie would be tedious. 

Women:

Many

People of Color:

No

Gratuitous Nudity:

Nude swimming happens

• Director: Zabou Brietman
• Writers: Zabou Brietman, Agnès de Sacy
• Actors: Bernard Campan, Lea Drucker, Charles Berling
• 114 min
• French
• IMDB

Guys and Balls (Männer wie wir) (Germany 2004)

The Gist:

Ecki is the golden boy star goalie of his town's football (soccer) team. That is until he's accidentally outed one drunk night after a bad game. After he is kicked off the team for being gay, he vows to form a gay team to play against his former teammates, heading out to the big city to do just that.

Comments (with spoiler):

This is pretty much the definitive "Gay athlete joins a gay team to victory" movie. That is: 

1. Athlete comes out/is outed.
2. Athlete gets kicked off team.
3. Athlete joins an existing or forms a new rag tag gay team
4. Gay team plays his old straight team and wins proving that gays are just as tough as the straights! 

While all this technically counts as a spoiler, the story should not be a surprise to anyone who's ever seen a movie before. While fairly predictable, the movie is actually fair to good, though with some issues. 

Considering some of the jokes, and that the gay team ends up being an assembly of assorted gay stereotypes, it's pretty clear that the movie was written/intended for a wide audience not too familiar with gay culture. Although to be fair, the S&M guys and others are much less over the top than you would expect in an American movie.

Despite this, it's still worth a watch if you feel like something unchallenging and cute, though obviously not if you hate soccer.

Women: 

Sister, mother, would-be girlfriends, in other words, the real world

People of color:

A few of the gay teammates

Gratuitous nudity:

Some minor locker room stuff as a joke

• Director: Sherry Horman
• Writer: Benedict Gollhardt
• Actors: Maximilian Brückner, Dietmar Bär
• 106 min
• IMDB

Theft (AKA: Theft of the Drag Queen’s Wig) (U.S. 2007)

The Gist:

In a small Texan town, an up and coming Christian preacher decides that the quickest route from small town preacher to big time TV evangelist is for her to go after the local gay leather bar by framing it's new owner for arson. While this is happening, a stranger comes to town and secrets will be revealed. 

Comments:

There's something about this movie that makes it seem mean to just write that it is bad, there's an earnestness about it, but bad is the best adjective for it. Acting is meh to okay, and how a small Texan town manages to have enough local leather enthusiast gay men to not only support a gay bar, but one that "specializes" as a leather bar is never explained.

The focus is split between three main things: the overacting antics of the preacher, unfunny drag comedy skits at the leather bar, and the bar owner and stranger falling in "like" with each other. Of the three story lines, only the "romance" manages to be sort okay, but sort of okay doesn't compensate for the rest of the movie being boring and poorly acted. 

Women:

Preacher and church goers 

People of color:

At least one of the background leather guys though I don't think he had any lines, so technically no

Gratuitous nudity: 

Partial? Maybe? I saw it yesterday and it's already proving to be unmemorable

• Director: Paul Bright
• Writer: Paul Bright
• Actors: Mathew Burnett, Cynthia Schiebel, Patrick Henderson
• 90 min
• Note: While Theft of the Drag Queen's Wig appears to be the original working title and Theft the final title, both titles are in use at different websites as it's actual title.
• IMDB

GBF (U.S. 2013)

The Gist:

The top three ruling popular girls at a high school, having learned from magazines, TV, and movies that every woman needs a gay best friend (GBF), try to out maneuver each other to swoop up the only (accidentally) out gay on campus, nerdy boy Tanner, to ensure that they, and not their two rivals, will be prom queen.

While dealing with his sudden found popularity, Tanner also has to figure out how to deal with his best friends who are now all angry with him. 

Comments (with a mild not really surprising or relevant to plot spoiler): 

The story description has all the earmarks of potential horribleness, but it surprisingly manages not to be. Which is not to say that it's particularly good. Cute would be a better adjective. Also fluffy. Cute and fluffy. 

It's decent quality wise and is amusing, if not laugh out loud funny. 

There is also a lesson in it somewhere. Something about being true to yourself, or accepting people as people and not objects, or something something high school something something, but well, the lesson isn't perhaps super important when there's so much cuteness going on. Also fluffiness. Cuteness and fluffiness. 

Oddly it's rated R, because as cute and fluffy as the movies is, apparently the sight of two teen boys kissing means that actual high school teens are presumed to be too young to see it without adult supervision. Spoiler, you get to see two high school "age" boys kissing. 

Joke aside, the rating is rather annoying, because compared to most high school teen movies, this one is rather sweet and innocent, leaving "the gay" as the only reason for the R. 

Women:

Yes

People of color:

Some

Gratuitous nudity:

No

• Director: Darren Stein
• Writer: George Northy
• Actors: Tanner Daniels, Brent Van Camp, FAwcett Brooks, Shely Osgoode, Caprice Winters
• 92 min
• IMDB

Horror in the Wind (U.S. 2008)

The Gist:

Two oddball scientists are attempting to become rich by creating a pest control "formula" that eliminates rat's sex drive. President Pat Robertson hears of the project and steals it to spray over the entire world as part of his war against premarital sex. Unfortunately the "formula" doesn't actually stop rats (and people) from having sex, it just changes your sexual orientation, threatening to turn the entire world gay. While all this "science" and "intrigue" is going on, the two oddball scientist's wives do a lot of nude yoga together. 

Comments with major and unimportant spoilers: 

The movie pretty much fulfills all the stereotypes of terrible low budget movies. Everything from acting to plot to technical issues and special effects is bad. Worse, it also fails at humor, so instead of the farce with comments about religion, homophobia, and politics that the premise sets it up to be, it's just boring. 

Also slow. There are so many montages going on. "We are doing science" montages, "we are fishing" montages, "the entire world is now gay and loving it and having sex but we aren't" montages. That last one counting as character development I guess, because despite having been turned gay and falling in love the two goofy scientist leads are moody and wishy washy about moving their bromance up to next level of actual sex even though everyone else in the world appears to be reveling in gay as the new norm. 

Put short, it's not good. 

Women: 

Several 

People of color:

Barely

Gratuitous nudity:

One quick partial male butt, and lots of female baldy parts during the female nude yoga scenes (because nothing says gay movie like female nudity?)

• Director: Max Mitchel
• Writer: Max Mitchel
• Actors: Perren Hedderson, Morse Bicknell, Courtney Bell, Jiji Hise
• 90 min
• IMDB

Codependent Lesbian Space Alien Seeks Same (US 2011)

The Gist:

When they are determined to be a threat to their planet's environment because of their "big feeling," three alien lesbians are shipped off to earth to fix them. That is, the Earth lesbian dating scene sucks so bad that it will break their hearts and eliminate those pesky emotions, er "big feelings."

Except that it does not go quite to plan and one of the aliens, Zoinx, ends up in a relationship with a bit of a sad sack woman named Jane, while two "Men in black" guys observe the goings on. 

Comments:

It's difficult to make a low budget comedy which riffs on bad low budget movies without ending up bad in the process, but this movie succeeds. Well, mostly. There are parts that are a bit rough / are weaker than others. Also, while it is funny, the jokes, at least for me, were a bit more smirky humorous than laugh out loud hilarious.

Even though I think it was well done, it is not something I'd recommend without hesitation unless you were into oddball, quiet humor, have a high tolerance for nonsensical plots, and a love for silly 50’s sci-fi B-movies. 

Women:

Well, yes… Obviously 

People of Color:

Some of the Earth women dates 

Gratuitous nudity:

No 

• Director: Madeleine Olnek
• Writer: Madeleine Olnek
• Actors: Lisa Haas, Susan Ziegler, Jackie Monahan, Cynthia Kapalan
• 76 min
• IMDB

Simon (Netherlands 2004)

The Gist:

Shy gay dental student Camiel is drawn into the life of outgoing, outrageous, libertine straight man Simon, at least until they have a falling out that is. They meet again years later and Camiel is once again pulled into Simon's life and circle of friends, except this time things are more serious. 

Comments:

First off, despite being included in various lists of "gay movies," it is not a gay themed movie. 

It does not have a 'gay protagonist' per say as much as it has a protagonist who just happens to be gay. His being being a somewhat introverted person who is more an observer of life than participant is far more important to the story than his sexual orientation. 

So, not a gay movie. What it is though is a pretty good story about living life and facing death. It's worth watching, though with a caveat, or rather a warning, that charismatic Simon who serves as our lesson giver and guide to fully embracing life and facing death is a drug dealing, egotistical, misogynistic ass. One with a "heart of gold," but still an unmitigated ass. 

Women:

Yes

People of color:

Yes

Gratuitous nudity:

Topless women 

• Director: Eddy Terstall
• Writer: Eddy Terstall
• Actors: Cees Geel, Marcel Hensema
• 102 min
• Dutch, English, German, Thai
• IMDB

Romeos (Romeos ...Anders Als du Denkst!) (Germany 2011)

The Gist: 

Lukas, a young German transsexual man in the processes of transitioning has been, much to his annoyance, assigned to female housing during his civil service. 

Luckily, a friend from his home town, Ine, is already there, and through her he meets a new group of largely gay and lesbian friends including Fabio, the closeted "Alpha Gay" of the group. There is an instant bond between the two, and as their connection deepens, Lukas must deal with the risks and consequences of coming out to Fabio. 

Comments:

The movie is really good and is an interesting view of a man transitioning. 

It ends up being a celebration of "maleness," both physical and emotional, not only in Lukas exhilarating in the changes his body is going through, but also in every scene between Lukas and Fabio acting super cocky with each other in the way that young men sometimes do when they're burning with so much excess energy they have no idea what to do with themselves. 

The movie practically sweats testosterone. 

Part of that maleness and change though is that Lukas is at times self absorbed to the point of being a jerk to his friends and family (so it kind of just desserts that he falls for the only character even more self absorbed than he is).

Women: 

Several

People of color:

Some

Gratuitous Nudity:

Some bare butts and bare breasts

• Director: Sabine Bernardi
• Writer: Sabine Bernardi
• Actors: Rick Okon, Maximilian Befort
• 94 min
• German
• IMDB